Friday, February 10, 2012

on the outside looking in.

Left out. I was that kid for a long time...or at least I thought I was. All of my friends liked me. Every time I saw them they screamed my name (heh heh) and hugged me and stuff... but still I felt left out.

I felt alone.
Like no one has been through what I've been through.
No one to tell.
No one to ask.
No one to be there for me.

I was on the outside looking in.
I thought I was stuck.
That I would always be the kid who was secretly hurting.

Until I found out that I wasn't alone.
In my life.
In my memories.
In my thoughts.

Jesus was there. Once I said that I wanted Jesus in my life, the pain didn't hurt as bad...because I knew that I wasn't going through the motions alone.

For he himself [Jesus] is our peace...
and has destroyed the barrier.
Ephesians 2: 14

I was in a storm with my past and I thought I was alone, but Jesus can break through barriers. He can break through your deepest hurt. The walls you've put up that you're too scared to take down, he can break down. And I know what it feels like to feel vulnerable...Jesus won't take down your walls and leave you. He'll replace them with himself to protect you, to guard you when the things you had up before didn't.

But it was hard.
And maybe you're too scared to take down your barriers yourself.
But Jesus can do it for you.
He'll take them down one brick at a time...
and replace them with love.
Real love.
Not the fake kind that you think you can get from guys.
Real love.
The smiling kind, the jumping kind, the laughing kind.
Maybe then you won't feel so stuck anymore.

And I know what it feels like to wait for the storm to pass.
And I know what it feels like not to hear God,
and I know what it feels like to continue to believe you're alone,
and to be blind from the sunshine in life,

but know that Jesus is doing something.
and maybe you just can't see it yet.
but he's breaking through that barrier.
Be in the inside looking out.
Try to find those people who are still on the outside.
Bring them in.
Love them when they're friends and family haven't.
Make them smile...
That's God's love.
Spread it.


  1. Emma,

    This is beautiful. I really don't know what else to say about it. Only that it is exactly what I needed to hear and I will be sharing it like woah. Dropping it like it's hot so to speak =)

    Have a great weekend.

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